Mums condition is once again changing, and again for the worst. Yesterday a nurse from St Christophers came to see mum. She was here last week, and had a long talk with mum, ordered some more meds and got a good general idea of her condition. When she left I popped in to see mum and was puzzled when she asked "who was that woman?". It appears her memory is now slipping, and this in turn is causing her frustration and anxiety.
On talking about it she says she has no recollection of ever meeting her before, doesn't know where she was from or what she was here to do. So when she had asked her to help unblock her hearing aid there was some confusion which led to mum feeling annoyed.
Even once I explained where she was from mum was still less than happy with the experience, and still thought she was here in a caring capacity, rather than a medical one. She said all the woman was doing was referring her to different people for different things, which is what they are meant to do.
There have been a couple of other occasions very recently where there has been confusion about who she is speaking to, but now this has happened I can keep my eyes open for it more.
The other evening I met her in the hallway, coming from her room, she spoke to me briefly then went out the back for a cigarette, only to come in moments later saying that's not what she came out for, and went to the loo instead. Subtle forgetfulness or confusion, this is what I have to start identifying the differences between.
Another thing I have noticed recently is another form of confusion I guess. The other day she asked for her bank statement so she could go through her finances. So yesterday I got it and took it to her. I handed it to her and retreated to the door. I then watched on as she turned it over a few times, and her eyes scanned it in an almost uncontrolled manner, flitting about from top to bottom, side to side and back again. Not wearing her glasses either. So I'm not sure if she could even read it, let alone take it all in. She then looked up, noticed I was there and handed it back thanking me.
All these little things added up are naturally cause for concern and something I am going to need to discuss with the doctor asap. The last thing I want is to not get things sorted if her memory and thought process are starting to slip. Also extra care is called for, to keep an eye to see she is not putting herself in danger. So much to consider and think about, but not a clue how to think about the practical aspects. I shall get in touch with St Christophers again asap too.
The part that confuses me is the selectiveness of the memory. The carer is here today, and she remembers her fine, but someone she has met before on numerous occasions but only weekly she has forgotten. Yesterday I asked her about something that had just happened with the carer, and she recalled something from the day before as if it were moments ago. I know the whole memory doesn't just go overnight, but the bits that are going like this have probably gone un noticed until now because of the way its happening.
But I'm SURE its going now. The next question is, is it dementia or the cancer causing this. I'm no doctor, so I won't be guessing on this one at all. I just want it addressed as soon as possible so we know what to expect, and how to deal with what's coming.
With all this in mind I feel amazingly relaxed about things. Maybe its because things are cooling off a bit for me right now. It could be the medication is still in my blood, or just that I know I have a long period of respite coming up and am looking forwards to it. Will be nice to once again travel away from London and relax for a bit. I say relax, but staying at Cadell's and having Archie the ankle biter about is never dull lol. But I look forwards to the change of scenery and the change of company very much.
Hoping to see a few people as usual, maybe off to see aunt and explain what's going on with mum etc. Let's see what happens. But like I say, main thing is we know mum needs to see the doctor soon, and what to tell him too.
Right, I better get on, almost time to walk the hounds and soak up some spring weather while its good. Have a good day all 🙂
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