After a long deep breath, and contemplation with a good friend today, whilst supping coffee and talking about life, a few things became clearer.
Situation that I find myself in seem less confusing, reasoning for things more apparent, and a little sense of direction returns. Its amazing how the ear of another person can make things seem a little more straight forwards. And a few (many on this occasion) words of advice can go a LONG way.
When I got home this evening I spoke to mum about the situation, in order to try and understand where all this came from. By all accounts a few little things have caused a massive over reaction to things, and for some reason it all blew out of proportion. Naturally its still my fault, of course. But at least I understand the situation a little better, and now know what she actually wanted all along.
Her choosing silence over discussion was probably not the best idea, especially when she chose to tell me "its good to clear the air". Ironic or what! So there are some things to attend to tomorrow in order to get things back on track.
She suggested getting the cash card back, to which I said I'm not bothered either way, as long as its decided like adults and not all cloak and dagger with me left in the dark about everything. Her other requests were, explain what her meds are, that's something the nurse is better to do, not me. Have her bank statements, which is fine, they are all filed, and now she tells me she doesn't like Tesco ready meals and wants it from Sainsburys instead... So why not say that sooner, doh!
So, slightly happier right now, but still need a proper break from it all to get to grips with myself.
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