Well, after listening back to the conversation I had with mum last night (I recorded it) and deciding I was polite, factual and didn't try and influence her decision, at least I am happier about one aspect of my life. For now at least. Her decision is as long as she has money in the house in case she needs my sister to get something for her she is happy for me to hold the card. But I will be leaving it in the house from now on anyway.
Her other requests of going through the bank statements with her, shopping at Sainsburys, and explaining all her meds to her I can handle too. I'm still surprised that none of this was ever mentioned before. All easy to deal with really.
The meds side of things is a bit of a worry, as I don't prescribe the drugs, I only organise them in the pill box, so maybe the GP or nurse are better qualified to explain their purposes to her. All drugs having a number of uses, so better she knows the right reason from them, rather than a Wikipedia explanation. The volume she takes, I can understand the concern, but it also highlights issues with her memory that are starting to show.
Yesterday she asked what one pill in particular was, I explained its use, but was a little shocked that it was only prescribed and explained to her a day or two ago. Maybe she just didn't listen properly, or maybe she forgot. But the next one is more worrying. After my sister called back a nurse yesterday to arrange an appointment, she informed mum that the nurse would be coming around on Friday. By the time I got home, mum was convinced that the appointment was for today! I have said a few times now that Paula said it is Friday, but she is adamant that its today. So that's a bit of a worry that her mind is working that way. Hence me deciding to start recording important conversations.
The next worry is rationalisation of situations. It really needs an outside influence to decide if this is affected in any way. I'm no expert, and also somewhat biased about matters, so would be wrong for me to judge. So calling it into question for another to make a judgement is the best I can do. Again hospice staff to the rescue I think. Her conversation jumps from one subject to another. Maybe trying to change the subject, or maybe just unable to keep the thought train steady. I really don't want anything going wrong with that area, but something just screams 'prepare' right now.
Thank you to everyone who has reached out and helped in these matters recently, it is deeply appreciated and humbling. Its nice to know this blog reaches caring people, and to know there is a safety net beneath 🙂
So today I start with a different approach to things, more hands on, more communication, and start to explain some things to her. Let's see how that all goes.
In the meantime I am waiting on a call from work for a pre 12 meeting near work to discuss the on going absence. But its getting a bit late now, and will be short notice soon, so I hope that happens soon. I am also still planning a break from here. I know I usually get away at weekends but have not done that this week. However I feel this time a few more days might do some good, so that's the plan. Derby and surrounding areas here I come. Places to stay for the night required if you are reading and have one lol. Just got to sort out kennel fees for the dogs. Its unfair to expect others to take care of them for so long. Donations welcomed lol.
Right I better get ready in case work call, and get on with my other duties too.
Thanks for reading, and here's for a positive day.
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